Every couple faces challenges in their relationships. The key to overcoming these challenges is finding the right guide.

Couples therapy can be an invaluable resource. It provides guidance, insight, and support because we, as couples therapists, are not in your relationship and can offer more perspective

If you’re thinking about couples therapy in Denver, this guide will assist you in understanding what to expect and how to locate the best therapist for your needs.

Understanding Couples Counseling

Couples counseling, often called marriage counseling or relationship therapy, is a form of psychotherapy designed to help couples of all types recognize and resolve conflicts to enhance their relationships.

Couples therapists will help you understand underlying patterns – learned growing up or from past relationships – that keep you stuck. 

Through couples therapy, you will be able to spend less time in disconnection and more in connection.

You will also know how to repair if you find the relationship in the negative pattern again.  

The Goals of Couples Therapy

The main goal of couples therapy is to improve the quality of your relationship. Our framework is a relationship that is collaborative, equal, kind, and passionate.

This involves learning about each other, such as, what makes us feel loved? Additionally, what are our vulnerabilities? 

With this insight, couples therapy offers effective communication techniques and problem-solving skills grounded in agreements.

Common Practices in Counseling Sessions

In the beginning, the couples therapist learns about your relationship – your dance, your strengths, your histories, and your motivations.

Your therapist will learn each partner’s perspective on the issues and synthesize these perspectives to create a workable plan for your relationship goals.

This open dialogue helps identify the root causes of your conflicts.

Our therapists want the best part of you to show up in the relationship. In RLT language, we refer to that as your “wise adult” part – the part of you that is interested in using the tools we teach and in the health of the relationship.

We help you work with your adaptations you may have learned growing up that were adaptive then but are maladaptive now.

For example, you needed loud anger to protect yourself psychologically growing up, but nowadays it’s maladaptive because you can use more sophisticated tools as an adult. You can also learn to take care of those younger parts that get triggered.

Over time, you’ll learn to communicate more effectively, express your wants and needs without anger or resentment, and listen to your partner’s concerns with empathy and understanding.

Debunking Myths About Couples Therapy

Many people have misconceptions about what couples therapy entails. Here are a few common myths and the realities behind them:

• Myth: Therapy is only for couples in crisis. Reality: While therapy can be incredibly beneficial for couples in distress, it is also useful for those who want to strengthen their relationship and learn new communication skills.

• Myth: Couples counseling ignores underlying patterns. Reality: Couples often get stuck in negative cycles (e.g., one pursues, the other withdraws). Counseling helps identify these patterns, understand their origins, and find a way out.

• Myth: Talking about family of origin is about blaming parents. Reality: Discussing your family of origin helps you understand how your upbringing influences your current relationship patterns. It's about gaining insight, not assigning blame.

• Myth: We don’t take sides. Reality: In RLT therapy, we align with the “wise adult” part of you to help you navigate younger, or adaptive, reflexes that were learned growing up.

How to Choose the Best Couples Therapist in Denver

Price

The average rate for master' s-level clinicians in couples therapy is about $200 per hour.

Insurance can help with the cost. Most therapists can offer “out-of-network” benefits where you pay for the service, then you submit a receipt to your insurance company. Insurance companies may provide you reimbursement for each session.

To learn more about our "out-of-network" calculator, click here. 

There are limited options for “in-network” couples therapy. One straightforward way to find these is by visiting psychologytoday.com/us/therapists/co/denver, then click the Filters tab, then your Insurance, and types of therapy: Couples Counseling. Hopefully, some helpful results will be available to you.

Check Qualifications

Ensure that your prospective therapist is licensed and has the proper credentials. They should have specialized training in couples therapy using proven methods such as RLT, PACT, EFT, or the Gottman Method.

Our agency prefers RLT, PACT, and Gottman. Here’s some industry insight: All couples therapists believe their approach is the best. I view it as the perspective from the top of the mountain (collaboration, harmony, trust) being the same, but there are different paths (RLT/EFT) to reach it.

 Initial Consultation

Many therapists provide an initial consultation, which is required for our agency. 

This consultation presents a valuable opportunity to assess your comfort level with the therapist and inquire about their methods and experience. Trust your instincts – it's crucial for both you and your partner to feel at ease.

Regular Sessions

Couples therapy typically involves regular sessions, often held weekly or bi-weekly. 

Maintaining consistency is essential for making progress. Each session builds on the previous one, enabling you to apply what you've learned in your everyday life.

If regular sessions are too challenging for your schedule, consider a couples therapy intensive.

Homework Assignments

Your therapist may assign you exercises or activities to complete between sessions. These tasks are designed to help you practice new skills and reinforce what you've learned.

Our agency provides an app to simplify the homework process with notifications and a place to store your reflections.  

Conclusion

Couples therapy can be a powerful tool for improving your relationship. By understanding what to expect and how to choose the right therapist, you can take an important step towards a healthier, more fulfilling partnership. 

Remember, seeking help is a sign of strength and a commitment to your relationship's future.

In Denver, there are a lot of skilled therapists to chose from. If you'd like to get started in that process, feel free to set up a free consultation with someone from our team. 

With the right guidance and support, you can work towards a stronger and more connected relationship!